I’m currently listening to Beloved by Yiruma whilst typing up this review (please check out Tille’s A Wish for Us Spotify playlist, it’s pretty amazing!), and as I’m listening I can literally feel my heart beating faster and harder with every key stroke, as I rethink “special” moments in the book.
A Wish for Us, has had me a little conflicted, after reading it, I felt a little flat, and was a 3.5 star (stay with me here, this is the longest review I’ve written in over a year). Nearly all of my friends said they cried solid from 60%, I didn’t, so what was wrong with me, was I emotionless, did I have a heart, I know that’s not true, firstly I’m living and breathing, secondly come on I cried from 3% solid during ATBK, and had ink etched into my skin forever, however digressing , 91% in to A Wish for Us, my emotion found me “I found life hard, Bonnie. Every day, when I took a breath, I felt like I was breathing in tar. Every step I took was walking in quicksand. I had to keep moving or I would be pulled under. I fought it. But the truth was, I wanted to sink. I wanted to close my eyes and disappear and stop the fight. The fight to want to live, when for as long as I could remember, all I’ve wanted is to let go.” Jesus those words, powerful! Easton you sonofabitch you broke me! I didn’t cry, I wasn’t a balling mess, but my heart stopped beating as I savouried every word of that note, and it’s resonated deep in my soul.
You can’t escape the emotion and pain of Bonnie’s journey, Tillie’s words throughout the whole book were touching, emotional, haunting and utterly beautiful. “Some are not meant for this life for too long. A fleeting glimpse, a silent birdsong. Souls too pure, they burn out to bright, Bodies so fragile, losing the fight. Hearts lose their beats, rhythms too slow, Angels they come, it’s time to go.” .
But it was Cromwell that I was drawn to whilst reading, I’m 41 years old, I’ve studied music, I can play instruments, I read and write, I understand layers, symphonies and also love a bit of EDM (again check out the playlist, it’s killer!) but I’ve never heard of Synesthesia. Now I’ve spent endless hours since finishing A Wish for Us, reading up on synesthetes and synesthesia, totally opened my eyes, and has given me a newfound appreciation or seeing the world through someone elses eyes. Now if only I could find a synaesthesia exhibition. “With colors in your soul that you let me see too.”
Bonnie’s love and loss had you feeling right along with her, and as I reflect back on the book, reliving paragraphs, chapters, words, scenes, I realise what to me initially felt flat, was turning into something special, a book much like A Thousand Boy Kisses, that will stay with you, one that you’ll remember, not necessarily for the romance between Cromwell and Bonnie, but for the words, the meaning, the message.
A Wish for Us, has taken root, and grown on my soul, and what initally started out to be a 3.5 star (equals good), 5 days later, much thought provoking, Google researching and reminiscing has blossemed into a solid 5 stars, and captured my heart!
Whilst I love Tillie’s serial books, I really hope you keep writing YA standalone’s with the same raw emotion, as you really do create masterpieces!
Stargazing (Orchestra Version) – Kygo, Justin Jesso, Bergen Philharmonic Orchestra – TOP FAVOURITE!
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